Back in the day words didn't ooze out of my hands. They didn't induce tears or grab me from my neck, twisting hard. Back in the day I couldn't attach emotion, it was floating over bodies, poems, held hands. I could not pin them down, would reach for it as far as my arms could grab. Back in the day I accepted a brain of fallacies to shape reasoning for my actions--I made irrational decisions and deemed them excusable for my young age. Back in the day I didn't see laughter in the sun. I did not find peace in solitude. Back in the day I made love, produced, franchised, and sold love. Today I can't even buy it.